“Maybe you didn’t give him enough love?” I have heard this. It ripped my heart in unbelievable ways… but it also started me on a journey of unpacking where did this come from? Why would mothers even consider shaming one another this way? What are the social conditions that would even make us go that… Continue reading On Maternal Self-blame
Category: Mothering
So have you heard of IFS yet?
✨✨✨Celebrating the BIG and SMALL victories! And this one feels huge! HORÓ Counselling has added a powerful tool to her (mine, that’s a bit weird) treasure chest of magic! In the last year and a half I have been training, and mastering my craft of healing, care, support, transformation and magic ✨ It has been… Continue reading So have you heard of IFS yet?
Mothering during a pandemic – book chapter
📚 A brand new chapter!!! It is a part this epic collection On Mothering during a Pandemic. This chapter is dedicated to all the mamas I interviewed as part of my research role at Peach Tree Perinatal Wellness who shared with me the Good, the Bad and the Ugly! I took a small part of… Continue reading Mothering during a pandemic – book chapter
Motherhood and the Ivory tower of Academia
Mothers in Academia…oh what a topic! Riddled with controversy. This graduation day is a micro representation of the ambivalent emotions I felt all throughout my research work, starting in 2010 with my Master of Research in Psychology. My then 7 year old son on PhD graduation day My story sits outside of the “modern academic… Continue reading Motherhood and the Ivory tower of Academia
On Parts Work (IFS, Internal Family Systems)
When we incorporate Parts Work into our everyday language we can begin to see and experience challenges differently. Instead of: 🖤 “I am such an angry mother” try♥️ “A part of me is feeling very angry towards…”(and listen to all that Angry Part has to show you about your unmet needs) Instead of: 🖤”I feel… Continue reading On Parts Work (IFS, Internal Family Systems)
On rituals
I have been digging deep into Ritual work and gathering more and more evidence on the profound role ritual plays in our lives. Ritual is any gesture done with intention and with emotion. And the effects, when ritual is done from the heart and is well contained and held by a trusted and safe other,… Continue reading On rituals
A little poem about MotherWound
Mother, by Aleksandra Staneva I love weaving stories from both my clients and also those parts that resonate with my own experience. With love, Aleksandra
Perinatal mental health week – what I wish I knew back then…
Today we wrap up Perinatal Mental Health week here in Australia, and the recognition of the critical care that new mothers and families need during pregnancy and early motherhood. I would argue that this care needs to be stretched from before conception to late/teenage motherhood (the one I find myself in right now). However, let’s… Continue reading Perinatal mental health week – what I wish I knew back then…
Boys to men, and the mending of souls
My husband teaching our son how to 🧵 sew! I always thought I would naturally be the one who teaches these “softer” skills while men in my son’s life would be the ones to pass on the hard ones. Wrong! This is how we change outdated traditionalist beliefs that boys should not bother with skills… Continue reading Boys to men, and the mending of souls
Befriending Anger
A frequent friend that visits my Counselling practice is Anger. It is always unwelcome, feared, dreaded, or exiled. And of course Anger does not appreciate its closeted state. It rumbles and tumbles. It scratches and escapes at the most unexpected situations. It can be explosive, hurtful and dangerous, especially to more vulnerable parts of ourselves,… Continue reading Befriending Anger
