Reflections on Shadow work through the series Monster: the Ed Gein story
Category: IFS
When her Shine awakens your Shadow: the ache of comparison
There are moments when we cross paths with someone who seems effortlessly radiant. She carries beauty, confidence, or success in a way that makes it look natural. And instead of feeling inspired, something twists inside. A heaviness. A knot in the stomach. I bet you have been that woman. I bet you have been the… Continue reading When her Shine awakens your Shadow: the ache of comparison
When the “ego” grows too large: Inflation against the terror of being ordinary
When we are born, we enter the world in a natural state of inflation. The infant is the center of its universe. Every cry brings response, every hunger expects to be filled, every discomfort longs to be soothed. Inflation is the psyche’s first condition, a necessary beginning. In Jung’s language, the ego is meant to… Continue reading When the “ego” grows too large: Inflation against the terror of being ordinary
To the bone-thin kin of starved women inside us 🐺
To my kin with tired bones. Women who have carried too much for too long, listen. There are seasons when the she-wolf is hunted, exhausted, bones showing through her fur. She runs for years, giving milk when she has none, hunting with empty belly, guarding pups in a storm. Many women live decades like this.… Continue reading To the bone-thin kin of starved women inside us 🐺
When Migraines speak
I’ve lived with migraines most of my life. Sometimes they’ve crept in like a fog, other times they’ve struck like lightning, sudden, punishing, and unrelenting. For the past three days, I’ve been moving through yet another one. The world narrows. Light hurts. Sound feels like shards. My body curls inward, asking for darkness and silence.… Continue reading When Migraines speak
Creating from the bone: not quick, not copied, real
There is a sacred difference between replication and revelation. I come from a lineage of deep listening, to the bones of the psyche, to the symbols that rise unbidden, to the stories that live in the earth and in the breath of women gathered in circle. The spaces I create are not templates. They are… Continue reading Creating from the bone: not quick, not copied, real
Healer, hold yourSelf
There’s a paradox in the helping professions, we hold space for others while sometimes bypassing our own exhaustion. We teach nervous system regulation while running on fumes, listen to suffering while dismissing our own fatigue. At some point, the fire that fuels us begins to consume us 🔥 Burnout isn’t just about doing too much,… Continue reading Healer, hold yourSelf
Holding steady in a world on Fire
Lately, I’ve been feeling the weight of it all, the anxiety, the anger, the grief as the world is grappling with this political crisis. It moves through my body like a storm, sometimes sudden and sharp, other times a slow, aching heaviness that is informing my choices automatically. The world feels like it’s unraveling, and… Continue reading Holding steady in a world on Fire
On Maternal Envy
I used to see them. I still see them. The Mothers. The ones who seem effortlessly composed, whose kids adore them, whose homes radiate warmth, whose careers thrive without chaos. I watch, and something sharp stirs in me- envy. Melanie Klein would call it a primitive force, a part of me that feels deprived, believing… Continue reading On Maternal Envy
Let him fly (on mothering a teen)
I spent years thinking I had control, over outcomes, over my own survival, over my child’s path. But nothing humbles you faster than raising a 16-year-old young man. There’s a shift happening. He’s making his own choices, testing his own limits, and I can’t hold the reins the way I once did. My old instincts,hyper-independence,… Continue reading Let him fly (on mothering a teen)
Aleksandra Staneva, PhD - Internal Family Systems & Jung 