Becoming a MOTHER opens up deeply rooted wounds. Wounds and pain we thought we had “worked through” and processed successfully. All of sudden we wake up into our own ambivalence, confused emotions, broken fantasies about the Mother we thought we would be. Have we mourned enough our own story? Our own parenting wounding? Children who… Continue reading On the unconscious manipulation of our children
Category: therapy
I can rage when you hurt me, without losing you?
👧🏻 Inner child 👧🏻Reflecting on my own search of true self, you know…just a gentle weekend task of light existential dread…that those of us engage in on a regular basis (overintellualizing and its functions is part of what this post will be about, so bear with me). As Alice Miller, a great Psychoanalyst, shares her… Continue reading I can rage when you hurt me, without losing you?
Parenting well when you haven’t been well parented?
Parenting well when you haven’t been well parented? • Manage your own “baggage” ensuring it doesn’t spill over and pollute your children’s lives. This is usually an unconscious process so waking up to our baggage is a much needed step in our toolbox of care. • Reduce the amount of chronic unpredictable toxic stress in… Continue reading Parenting well when you haven’t been well parented?
MotherWound
At the centre of my work are MOTHERS on the margin. Dark Mothers, Mother Outcast, Mother-Rebels, Fluid Mothers, Un-pin-down-able Mothers. Mothers, who experience depression. Mothers, who feel ambivalent. Mothers, who regret it. Mothers, who drink. Mothers, who resent. Mothers, who smoke during pregnancy. Mothers, who career (that CAN be a verb, right - to career,… Continue reading MotherWound
On hearing the call towards transformation and healing
🌿On hearing the call to change🌿 Take some time to reflect on what it means to transform, heal, change, grow... Where does it even begin? The whispers from within that tell you: “Hmm, I wonder what would it feel like if I wasn’t in a constant state of vigilance, anxiety, fear?” “I wonder what is… Continue reading On hearing the call towards transformation and healing
Motherhood: my hardest quest and my best guide on self-awareness
It’s about 12 years ago, during my pregnancy, when I remember engaging with my parenting model for the first time, from a much different perspective. I was full of questions about my own way of parening. Who would I be in a few months? I remember filling journal pages with the Mother I saw my… Continue reading Motherhood: my hardest quest and my best guide on self-awareness
On cultivating a Forgiving Heart
💔What does Forgiveness look like for you?💔 Cultivating a forgiving heart is surely an endless, slow, deep-reaching and highly transformative process. Sitting with, facing, working with and embracing trauma is hard. Healing is a cyclic process. Transformation can happen suddenly, in a highly insightful moment, and also, and much more often, as a result of… Continue reading On cultivating a Forgiving Heart
Radical Self-Compassion for Mothers
When we judge ourselves, we judge others... When we are convinced we are selfish, we are inclined to suspect the same of others. If we hate those parts of us that are needy, we may feel disgusted, repelled and frightened by the neediness in others. If we feel we are failing, we may look for… Continue reading Radical Self-Compassion for Mothers
On mornings with mySelf
I don’t know how you love to spend your early mornings but I am going to share my routine of wellness which has supported me from early motherhood through mothering an almost 12-year old. Although many ways of doing and being have changed since then, and everything is logistically easier, my mental space is equally… Continue reading On mornings with mySelf
Sitting with the Discomfort
What a day...?! “Sitting with the discomfort” is not only a concept I work with my clients...it’s a state of mind that I constantly explore every day, and some days it’s right-in-my-face ...or whenever in my body it hits me. I sit, I breathe through it, I let it bubble up and watch from the… Continue reading Sitting with the Discomfort
Aleksandra Staneva, PhD - Internal Family Systems & Jung 